When Ishika asked me how I met my husband I replied on a social networking site. I thought she will be shocked to hear that and will say that you actually relied on a social networking site to find the love of your life?:O But on the contrary she wasnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t surprised in fact she told me that she know few others also who met their husband on a social networking site. Finding a mate for yourself is not an easy job for sure. DonÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t you agree to me?
I have discussed this with many friends of mine who are looking for a husband or to be precise whose parents are worried because their daughter is going to cross 25.We girls do feel insecure after all you canÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t create a soul mate quiz and ask the guy to fill the answer. If he clears the test then all thing done and you can marry him .No, I donÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t agree. TodayÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s women is intelligent, she has her own desires, expectations and she is not willing to settle down with anything less.
When my husband parents asked him where he met me his answer was common friend .This is because in India online dating or choosing your spouse online is neither believable and neither considered mature. I am not asking you to open a face book or an orkut account today itself and starts reading interesting profile 😛
Please, No what I am trying to say is MAKE AN EFFORT IN FINDING YOUR SOUL MATE.
This is what we girl donÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t do. We leave this either to our destiny or to our parents. I know our parents knows the best for you and will choose the best for you but 99% of parents think on only 2-3 prospective which is Money, cast(I am talking about India where this is a big issue now also), education and just one or two things more. If these things fit in their criteria then the guy is fit to be their daughter husband. But what about compatibility? What about hobbies, nature, attitude, thoughts etc ?
Nowadays we cannot tolerate many guys just because we do not like them and we may not have a reason behind not liking them. If I take my example I would have never settled down with a guy who is not interested in working hard. There are many girls who wouldnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t have given this thing that importance but for me this was and my parents have no clue about it.
So I thought of making an effort and I am proud of it and in fact my family is happy with my decision. So, how did I go about it? Well frankly speaking I always thought I will never get a good husband. I am from a traditional Marwari family and unlike my cousins I was too independent in my thoughts, a creative person who wouldnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t have mind jumping from the aeroplane just for kicks:P. Imagining myself married in a traditional family where I have to get up at 6 or 7 am , take bath and try to please everyone was not my kind of thing at all. There were other things as well which made me thing that I will never get a good husband.
Interesting thing is many of my friends also think the same .They too believe that they wonÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t get a good husband .Ha Ha!! This is quiet a sensitive issue which tends to make girl insecure. Therefore few things which can actually make you find a right guy for yourself are below but before you read ahead please donÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t be desperate to get married. Finding a right soul mate is not bad but being desperate for it is bad.
1. Many of my friends and my husband friends got married to a girl who was working in their company itself. Meeting your spouse on work place is not an bad idea because you can know about the person easily. Let your friends or colleague know that you are looking for a spouse .Of course donÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t tell them that I am trying in office 😉 but be open about it. One of my cousin sister got married to her friends brother. It was not a love marriage it was just that my sister friend really liked her and then she asked her brother to meet her and they got married.
2. You can try social networking sites but please donÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t start sending friends request to everyone .Things can turn out really ugly You should understand what is good for you and what is not. Talking to one of your class friend who is doing MBA from IIMs or who is doing well and from a good family is not a bad idea. Right? But talking to a guy who has is 24/7 online and talks to almost all the girls who he come across is certainly a bad idea. Woman have a good instinct and they very well can identify that and if you canÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t then donÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t try this one.
3. Upload your profile on various matrimonial site. Please , donÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t rely on your parents for that. I did upload my profile on shaadi.com and chatted there with few guys. It is not that the site is filled with only crappie or non sense people. Like you there can be other guys who will be interested and will looking forward a descent, understanding and educate spouse.
4. Try to be social. Weekends are not suppose to just sit and relax at home. Meet friends, join clubs and you can meet aunties too who are always interested in getting you married as you are 21 +.I know this might sound silly to you but some time it really works. May be your fat aunty who you thought is good for nothing becomes a person who you will thank whole your life.
MNC and his family is also looking for him. Of course you cannot just go and say Ã¢â‚¬ÂHi, I am so and so and I find you interesting .Are you looking for a prospective wife?Ã¢â‚¬Â..NO, you should not even think about this. If you like a guy just say Hi and ask him for some fitness tips or may be a friendly communication and then you can slowly move ahead.
There are many ways by which you can meet your future husband only thing is you need to be positive about it. You need to have faith in God and you never know when things can click for you.
If you have read this post till the end then I really believe that you are serious about it and I wish you all the best in your soul mate finding journey.
Your neighbourhood friend
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