My Post Delivery Experiences – Postpartum Depression

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Hello Everyone

I wanted to talk to all of you about something that most of us women have experienced but have not been able to put a name to it.  It is important that those around us also recognise that delivering a baby is not the end of preganancy and all it stands for.

Postpartum depression is a feeling of extreme sadness and related psychological disturbances during the first few weeks or months after delivery. Feeling sad or miserable within 3 days of delivery—is common after delivery.  I came to know about it when I started experiencing it myself. I got to know that it’s quite common is nothing  more than a serious mood change. It lasts weeks or months and interferes with daily activities  is a result of soo many changes that a mother goes through. The hormonal, psychological and biological factors often lead to PPD.

Read- QUIRKY PREGNANCY STATEMENTS 😀

postpartum depression india

Read - My C Section Delivery Recovery & Experience

 After 12 hrs of labour pain and an unexpected C-section, I went into this mild depression where nothing used to please me.  Everyone around me seemed to be happy, people were congratulating me, but all I felt was this big void. It was as if something was missing in my life and I thought it’s just because of the surgery and weight gain etc.

Symptoms may include frequent crying, mood swings, and irritability as well as feelings of extreme sadness. Less common symptoms include extreme fatigue, difficulty concentrating, sleep problems, loss of interest in sex and other activities, anxiety, appetite changes, and feelings of inadequacy or hopelessness. Women have difficulty functioning. They may have no interest in their baby.
In postpartum psychosis, depression may be combined with suicidal or violent thoughts, hallucinations, or bizarre behavior. Sometimes postpartum psychosis includes a desire to harm the baby. Fathers may also become depressed, and marital stress may increase. Without treatment, postpartum depression can last months or years, and women may not bond with their infant. As a result, the child may have emotional, social, and cognitive problems later. About one in three or four women who have had postpartum depression have it again.

Post Partum Depression Symptoms include –

1. Crying and tearfulness – I went into frequent crying bouts, had mood swings and got irritable.  There were  feelings of extreme sadness as well because I was constantly thinking that I’d never be as healthy as I was previously.

2. Anxiety and worry – I was constantly afraid that I would drop the baby or hurt her badly by mistake.

3. Irritability and hypersensitivity – Constant chattering aroung me and advice, advice and more advice was driving me insane…I hated speaking to my near and dear ones and also avoided talking on the phone.

4. Anger and feelings of inadequacy or hopelessness.

5. Negative thoughts, extreme fatigue, difficulty concentrating, sleep problems, appetite changes and to top that I would feel terrible about my post operative condzition.

Read - From Womanhood to Motherhood – The Beginning

This phase is also a testing time for the father and ones husband needs to be very understanding and cooperative…

It’s been 4 week since the delivery.  It is my family who is supporting me constantly. The love and scolding that goes hand in hand can keep anyone sane.  This helped me  think and see things normally.  I’m getting as much rest as possible by napping she does.  I do not have to do any housework because I have family to help  in every way. I need help when I shower and dress and for that I have my mum.  I am not alone and there is always someone to talk to about my feelings.  All of this has made me mentally fit and like I said in my previous post the most important thing.    In some cases things can be worse and a combination of counseling and antidepressants is recommended.  When one is breast feeding it is also going to effect the child.

One day I’ll look back at this bitter sweet phase in my life I will thank God for those around me, for their encouragement, positive thinking and the unconditional love and sacrifice made for K, the baby and me.  Taking care of the three of us and keeping the home running is no small task for anyone.

I would like to warn you about Post partum Obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) or Post Partum psychosis.   It is characterized by  violent thoughts or images – about harming your baby. Mothers who spend a lot of time alone or inside home only, can develop this. If you feel you are beginning to think like this, please consult your doctor immediately. These can be extremely harmful to you and the baby.  God Bless.

Do share your Postpartum depression experience if you experienced it

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85 COMMENTS

      • No I used to read this blog called postsecret, the person who started it, his wife committed suicide due to depression, and he wante people to open there are hearts and pour out secrets anonymously. So that he can help ppl fight depression. after lot of google n reading I came to know about this 🙁

  1. You are 100% correct Anamika that all things me too gone through 😥 ….before 3 years…..also i dnt have enough milk feed for baby is a addition stress for me…that he is always crying in the night won’t let me sleep as i need more rest at that time….For 1 year he did like this and no alternatives for me to take care of my baby….i got bad dark circles at that time….and hated myself to see in the mirror :sarcasm: ….But everything changed slowly all that i was in very patience that i am the MOM of my sweet kid :dance-left-right: ….So many to share…..hmmmm 🙂 i start to divert myself by seeing my baby’s every growth…. :-*

  2. hey anamika i regulalrly follow ur blog and am always impressed 🙂
    i have went through this in very same way as u are going .i have 3 months old baby girl and i have serious problem in breast feeding,i have very low supply from right side and even worst from left.am having lots of stress around me(sister wedding ,depression and fasting month ramadan) .my baby is on 99% formula milk which she doesnt like at.i wanted to feed her more i miss that feeling and she isnt ganing much wewight which i feel is because of me all i wanted to ask you is do u have any idea
    1) if i can increase my milk now???

    2)did u hear abt shatavari kalpa?? does it increase weight??

    3) am taking lactare (not regularly )

    4)do u know any good lactation in hyderabad

    am still not out of my drepression i feel am unwanted every where,not confident abt my apperance,no drop in weight(i gained 35 kg and lost 10 kgs)but i still look pumkin 🙁 may be because of this i started deiting since first few weeks and that effected my milk production.i started avoiding gathering as i think ppl talk only abt weight when they see me and i feel my husband too doesnt like me any more.i have lot going within me.how do i come over all this???i have no one around me to talk openly no elder sisters no married friends.
    i love my baby very much but am very careless towards her as i have all this running in my mind.and my husband says this happens as this is my first baby.
    THANKS TO ALL WHO READ MY MESSAGE I FEEL I SHARED WITH U

    and anamika be always close to ur baby as she would feel warm and secure and if ur baby is cranky while sleeping(like she wanted to sleep but wont sleep) make her liten WHITE NOISE dowload the app on mobile its same noise as babies get in mothers womb and they would feel nice to sleep long hours.
    i would keep sharing my experience with u
    Take ‘lots of care
    ANY ONES SUGGESTION IS ALWAYS WELCOME

    • hi zareen…i can understand wat u r going thru..as far as weight is concerned plz don bother abt it much…i know it is depressing to c the new pumpkin rself but i m sure we will overcome it…

      and yes i have heard shatavari increases breast milk.have u tried taking cumin seeds .? taking 1 tsp 2wise a day helps in increasing milk.with this having kheer also helps..i know few more remedies if u want i will do a post on it.

      if u feel that depression is getting worse then talk to your doc abt it.also listen to good music it really helps and talk to people around…i m surely going to download the application as my daughter gets really crankyy.

    • There are many ayurvedic medicines for this.. Talk to a good doctor…If your baby is gaining weight normally.. then dont worry much…

  3. ok inshallah i will take cumin seeds but will it help after 3 months??? and do any one have idea if shatavari adds on weight?? ok will mail u soon 🙂 and i will be thankful to see ur post on this remedies and do u know any lactation in hyd?? i assume ur in hyd now

    • no..unfortunately i don as i m not in hyd right now.shayavari wont increase weight i believe..and neither will cumin seeds.i chew 2-3 tsp every day and my weight has not incteased.also i hope u r having milk atleast 3 times a day.
      .

  4. Kudos to the strong soul in you Ana! 🙂

    Thanks for sharing such precious info with all of us… No woman would generally prefer to talk about all this…. You are the ‘hatke’ gal!!! 😀

    Love n muah to my jilloo.. 😀

      • goin fine Ana… put under medication n having monthly reviews… unfortunately i have gained loads of wieght … the doc says i need to put down weight so that results wil be better… so i m trying to lose weight gradually… hoping to get okay soon.. 🙂

  5. hi ana… i didn’t know that such kinda depression exists! even i have pcos! and right now more than worrying abt fertility, i am worried abt putting on wt due to pcos!

    • Hi Pranali.. true.. weight is the big issue with PCOS..

      if u r married pls go under medication rite away.. coz PCOS increases one’s chances of insulin resistance leading to diabetes.. and the doc wud always recco the best for u..

      if u r not married .. even then its good to go n get a routine done.. so that other prob like thyroid, hairfall n other stuff are not triggered…

  6. hi revathy! am not married yet! i was having severe hair thinning so my doc asked me to check whether it is due to pcos.and the results said that i have mild bulky ovaries! i dnt have thyroid so am not experiencing any wt gain at the moment but after what i read on wiki about pcos, am so freaking scared! also am loosing my hair which makes me so sad 🙁

  7. This is so true…I know many friends and new moms who hav gone thru this…it’s a boon t have understanding family and friends around in tis time…m so happy ur out f it now..muaah!

  8. OMG! 😯

    Aisaa sab bhi hota hai..mein toh already itni HYPER types hu… my guy will go all crazy bearing my Nakhras…. LMAO! God help us! thank u for the post…. 😀 :-* :hug-makeup:

  9. Aaaaaah all i can is… ure so lucky to have such caring folks around u n it’s wonderful that ure able to share all this with us :hug-makeup: Hope ure feeling better already dear. Waitin to see the old anamika back in action very soon :fighterf: :-))

    • Hi Nafisa, Touchwood ..there were 30 people standing outside the operation theater when my C section was going on .I feel blessed 🙂 i don know what i would have done without my friends and family.

  10. Well I went through the phase as well but really thanx to my lovely family I managed to survive and care for my baby as well lovely post Ana will help lot of ur readers

  11. Hey Ana, Ur experience is a boon to many of us…Meaning straight from the heart( :heart: )
    Not many women esp in India would talk about these experiences BUT its so very imp to talk it out with family,friends or ur doctor… Big Jaadu ki Jhappi to U to overcome all odds 🙂
    Kudos to u and all other experienced MOM’s

  12. Oh my! I am just learning so much from you. I don’t have a child yet, but would love that day and feeling to come into my life. I had no idea of PDD. Thanks for sharing!
    May the Goddess take care of you and your baby during this phase.

    Charishma

  13. Hi Ana,

    I have been reading your blog for a long time, but this is the first time I am commenting.

    I can understand you. I was in the same boat few months back. I delivered a baby girl last December. I too had a c-section. I don’t know what happened with the operation, post delivery I had severe cough & cold. You might realize how it must be to cough continuously when your belly is stitched all around. To add woe, I caught severe fever. The doctors were unable to find the cause of fever for all most TEN days. Finally after changing the doctor, I was diagnosed to have Typhoid and Malaria attack. Man ! That was a hellish time. Pospartum depression is an understatement to explain my situation.

    It took almost a month for me to recover. When I started to walk after the operation I realized that my body would never again be the same way as it was once. Sight of my belly was enough to get me depressed for the whole day.

    Now it is almost 8 months. I am still recovering. Life has become a roller coast ride now. Motherhood is not an overnight achievement. It’s a life long commitment. I am still trying to make sense of it. I am a full time working women. With my little girl around, I hardly get any time to do something for myself. I am almost redefining myself to get adjusted to this new life. So don’t be surprised of the challenges thrown at you after being a mother. Babies are bundle of joy. But it needs extreme PATIENCE to take pleasure in that joy. Happy motherhood. Don’t worry. This too shall pass.

    • Hi Vani,

      on my 5th day of recovery i coughed just for one second and oh! my GOD..my stitches pained like hell..infact i am scared to sneeze and cough after 1 month also.i seriously seriously can’t even imagine what you must have gone through and yes! sight of my belly too take me into depression but i think i will be able to reduce it all..hope we all momies together can share things and feel much better.

  14. Hi Anamika,

    Thanks for sharing your experience regarding postpartum depression, this will help a lot of moms who are now experiencing this kind of mental illness. I also want to share your personal story if you will allow by tweeting this page or sharing it on facebook. Moms are really the best and thank god you are doing fine right now.

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